"Love Is Never Enough, But It´s All I Have To Give"
"I can tell you 'I love you' as many times as you can stand to hear it and all it will do is just remind us the love just isn't enough. It's not even close"- George, "Life As A House"
Suppressing giggles, Padme watch from her spot on the terrace Leia clung furiously to one of Obi Wan's legs making it impossible for him to walk across the emerald knoll. The two of them had played like that for hours in the Alderaanian garden as Padme looked upon them from her makeshift bed.
"Don't they look marvelous together? They almost seem like a family. " The former Senator mused as the golden rays of the suns poured onto her sickly skin. It truly had been wonderful having Obi Wan for these past few days. Not only had she gotten back her dear friend and learned so much about the son she would never be able to know; but also Leia was quite taken with him. The serious child, who never seemed to like strangers had let her guard down for the Jedi Knight, she had allowed herself to make a friend.
With these simple joys Padme's heart felt content. Well, as content as it could be without her son and husband. But with the contentment came a realization that it was all ending. That her marker had decided it was time for her to journey from this world to the next. But being the stubborn woman that she was, Padme wasn't ready to leave just yet.
"I win! I win!" The pitter-patter of trotting feet and Leia triumphed shouts peeled Padme out of her daze. Before the ill woman stood her daughter smiling flourishing.
"You most certainly did Milady. You are just to fast for me." Padme saw Obi Wan voice from behind the tiny child, a wry grin across his face.
Leia's smile grew even wider and her eyes lit up with excitement. "Mommy did you see? Did you?"
A smile parted Padme's chapped gray lips. She was just like Ani, always demanding to be the center of her universe. "Yes darling I did see and you were wonderful. But now you must run along and see Auntie Yane. I need to speak with Master Kenobi."
Leia's face twisted in childish annoyance. "But I want to play!"
Obi Wan's mouth opened as if were to hush Leia's protests, but Padme got to her first.
"You have played more than enough for one day." Her voice was stern and cool like was when she had been Queen. But not even the famed ruler could keep up the charade when she looked into her daughter's velvet eyes. The stone was broken with her soft melodic laughter. "Oh darling give me a hug!"
Without hesitation the little girl tumbled into her mothers arms. Padme held Leia's delicate body as close as she could, letting her daughters love soak into her heart.
For the weary woman knew it would be the last chance she would ever have.
The two friends sat on the makeshift bed and watched as the suns of Alderaan dipped low into the western sky. Obi Wan wished he could stay here in this bliss forever, his beloved's delicate hand cupped in his coarse one.
But as wonderful as the moment was soon the radiant warmth of day would end make way for frigid frost of night. And the Jedi would end this happy moment, for the sake of her well being and his hearts.
"Padme, it will be nightfall soon. I think it's time I took you inside." His soft accented voice coaxed.
Padme shrugged at his words. The former politician was very good at not listening to things she didn't want to hear. She just gazed off at the blazing suns and began to speak. "Do you know that I should have died giving birth to Luke and Leia. Well at least that's what the healers whisper."
Obi Wan's gripped her tiny hand tightly in shock and horror. 'What was she saying?'
As is she had heard his words, Padme gave him a no nonsense answer "Oh Kenobi we both know that's the truth. This body of mine wasn't made to bare a child, let alone twins. It was a miracle that I lived though the labor." Another smile came across her ashen face as she turned towards him. "But I'm grateful that the Marker let me stay this long. Even though my time is running short now, at least I got to spend some time with my babies and those I love."
The Jedi Master swallowed hard at her words. He didn't want to listen to her talk this way. It was bad enough to have that dark cloud looming over his every moment with her stabbing his soul. But now she wanted to talk about her own demise. No, Obi Wan couldn't stand it.
"Padme I don't wish to speak of such-"
"Shh." She patted his rough hand tenderly. "Let me speak Obi Wan. I have so much to say but my times grows less with every passing minute. Let me speak."
With her intense coco eyes boring into his grayish ones, he simply nodded. He could never dine her no matter how much she could hurt him.
"Promise me you'll watch over and protect them Obi Wan. Promise that you'll make sure they will think well of their Father. That they'll think well of me. That I love them." Padme had taken on a desperate tone and her eye brimmed with sorrow. "Promise me Obi Wan."
"I promise." He answered with a gentle smile. "I promise."
Relief seemed to fill Padme has she lied back on the smooth pillow, but her face still held it's serious tones. "I still have to tell you one more thing."
Obi Wan's felt himself grow uneasy but he tried not to show it as he squeezed her hand. "Padme what is it."
"Obi Wan I'm-" Padme stop for a moment, as if she was unsure to go one. But then it was as if a wave of reassurance came over her. And she began to speak again. "in love with you."
Her words sent daggers to his frail heart. Obi Wan jerked his hands away from her as a haunted melancholy feeling returned to him. 'What was she saying? Was she taunting me? What about Anakin? Oh Force.Anakin!'
"But how? Anakin.you love him. That night.you saw Anakin not me!" Obi Wan shaky voice rambled as he looked away from her. For so long he had dreamed of her to say those words to him. And now that his dream had been made a reality.it only filled him with pain and shame.
"Obi Wan listen to me! Listen" Padme cooed as she tilted his head up to meet her gaze. Her feather like touch gingerly caressed his cheek as she attempt to clam him. But he merely flinched at her burning touch.
"Obi Wan I don't understand how I can feel this way.or how I can love you both." Her sorrows began to well up into tears. "And that night when I kissed you.I wanted so badly to pretend you were Ani. Then you left because you loved me too much.and I felt my heart break in too Not because Anakin wasn't their, but because you weren't. And as I cried I realized that I was in love with you."
Obi Wan just stared at her dumbfounded.
"So many times I tried to tell you how I felt. Tell you that I love you too. But instead I locked my feelings inside the inter-most chambers of my heart. Because love can never be enough, it's not even close. We both know that. We both have suffered though that."
The general let a miserable grunt escape his lips as he watched a milky tear stream down her pale cheek.
"Oh it was so cruel of me to tell you these things when now nothing could be changed. I never should have tortured you this way Obi Wan. But I couldn't leave this world without telling you I loved you." By now Padme hands had long since slid from his face, and now she rested her limp arms around him in an awkward embrace. "It may not be enough.but it's all I have to give."
Obi Wan wrapped his arms around her lithe figure in response to her words. Like she had said, love could never be enough for them for they were beings ruled by their duties. But for now, it was all that they could give.
"I love you Padme. I always have and always will." Then he bent down and kissed her. There first true kiss.
Obi Wan broke away from the kiss, and for the first time in so long he saw a hint of her sparkling smile that he thought was long since dead.
"And I love you Obi Wan." She sighed heavily and snuggled into the curves of his chest closing her deep brown eyes. "I think I'll sleep for a while."
Obi Wan just pulled her closer to him and kissed her silky curls. He just cradled his beautiful sweetheart his arms, fighting back the tears in his stormy eyes. For he knew that as scarlet sky turned to glittering night. She'd never wake again.